Walking in the rain

Yesterday,I walked back home after the class.
It was not the first time I walked back home.
Unfortunately,it was raining heavily after the economics class.
(Actually,it was raining for a short while.)
Before that,I did not cycle to UTAR but had planned to take a bus.
However,I saw many people waiting for the bus and I decided to walk back home again.
Luckily,Joie and Jey Ming insisted to walk together with me
although they actually cycled to UTAR.
Joie insisted to fetch me with her bicycle
but in vain as we kept on dropping out our things.
We asked Jey Ming to cycle back first
but he didn't want and walked together with us.

It was raining cat and dog although it was only a while.
Nevertheless,it made us so embarrasing
as the umbrella was blown to a weird shape and
a series of small incidents happened.
(I think you all can imagine it.)
It was also a funny scene that another Indian girl
who was listening to music while walking alone,
walked with a cool 'style' as if she didn't care when the rain stopped.
Walao A!!!
There were just a few rain stains on her shirt while
three of us were all rain-drenched.*-*
After that,Jey Ming concluded that that girl is thin
so her surface area to get the rain was smaller
and her probability to be rain-drenched was smaller.
I think he had studied Maths so hard until
he used the terms in daily communication.

I never thought that Joie and Jey Ming would accompany
me to walk back home especially during such bad weather.
Before that,I had walked together with my housemate,Yogest.
It was totally a different experience in UTAR.
We were so happy though it was raining heavily.
I appreciate to have them to become my friends.
I will never forget this special experience.
I hope we can fix the same timetable together for the next semester.
I really wish that our friendship can be forever.
xoxo.

Freestyle

by korean group,4 minute "Freestyle" Please focus on the lyrics.
I think the lyrics really describe my feeling rightnow.
I am busy and stressful these few days.
I can't mix with others-my second weakness in my life.
HAIZ!
I don't want to care so much now.
I just want freestyle.
Just do what I what.
I do want to care how the other stupid guys
think about me because you all are not important to me.
Be honest and follow my own heart.

I want to love myself and
I wanna be myself.
Don't be easily affected by the others.
It is the hardest challenge in my life.
Just wanna tell myself that I will be better soon.
I love myself.
xoxo.

Hey,guys! I was born this way...

I have not updated my blog for a month already.
So leceh to do all sorts of stupid assignments!!!
I will have 2 presentations and radioplay next week.
I hope I can handle my nervousness during that time.
It is my greatest weakness in my life.
I hope I can do well in all of these.

So stressful to be here...
I still can handle in my studies
but I can't communicate with others.
I am totally alienated.
I try to mix with the others but I can't
as if we all come from different worlds.
I know I'm ugly and not humorous.
Does this mean that I don't deserve to have friends?

Many asked for my facebook account.
Do I need to own one so that any of you can become my friends?
I'm lazy to chat with others and don't like to play games.
I don't want to do somethings that others like to do.
I don't want to become a photostat-machine.
Nobody here can understand me!
It is like I have to adapt to their lives so that I can mix with them.

GOSH!
I don't want to do that.
I will not force others to love me
as I have the same rights to not to love you.
Similarly,don't force me to do something I dislike.
Like what Lady Gaga said,"I was born this way."
I want freedom and this is the way I was born.
(Walau aaa!So cool I am!)

Lossssssy Guy---What A Racism!!!

I was extremely frustrated because of an arrogant malay man yesterday.
My aunt drove the car to go to visit the dentist
while my grandpa,my youngest sis and I were following,too.
My aunt found a parking space and tried to park the car.
Suddenly,a malay drove a car from the back and
moved in front to grab our parking space.
I gave him a signal to stop him from moving
and crashing into our car.
My grandpa was very angry and was mumbling.
(I think most people will give this respond as that malay
drove in that way.We can't blame my grandpa.)
After parking our car and shutting down our car engine,
that malay suddenly came out from his car and opened our car door
to scold my grandpa.
He acted so rude like he wanted to hit my grandpa.
He shouted that we all are "Babi"!
What the fuck!
If we were pigs,what was he?
He must be a big booger that can make an Amoeba to die!!!

It's totally unfair.
I admitted that I was a bit racist but
I felt angry not because of he is a Malay.
It's because he bullied us as we are Chinese.
I wonder that whether we will be abased by that malay
if we are Malays or Indians.
I don't think that we did any wrong in this matter,did we?
A law-abiting driver will not simply affront another driver
because of his own fault.
Hey,our dearest Malay kawan!
Don't tell me that our Malaysia government
doesn't sponsor you money for your education.
In fact,our government sponsors a lot of JPA scholarships
to those malays who don't perform well in their studies.
Please don't tell me that you are so haughty as you are not educated
and your Al-Qurah doesn't teach to be sensible and polite.
Malaysia Boleh as our country manage
to nurture so many irresponsible,arrogant "sakai"!

Another Case:
(http://dpriest.blogspot.com/2011/06/blog-post.html)
My friend who studies in a Malay school,
can't get her appeal form for transferation after waiting for many days.
The malay officers kept on giving a lot of excuses
when she wanted to get the form from them.
The malay teachers always scold the Chinese students who
came from Chinese school, as KURANG AJAR!

I regret that I didn't use my phone to take down the video
when that terrible malay scolded my grandpa
so that I can post it here.
Perhaps it's useless to do so or make any complaints as all the governmental societies
that claim to help the needies,are made up of Malays.
I still remember that the main actor in a Hong Kong drama said that
laws is the game of the rich man.
Is laws able to protect the Chinese who come from the lower class from racial discrimination ?
2020 is coming.
However,racial inequility is still serious in Malaysia.
Racial engineering is important to avoid this.
Our Malay kawan,please don't exploit other races' rights
and be rational and sensible.
You should not simply despise the other races
as you Malays are powerful in this country.
Please do remember that we all share the same mother earth!

Goodbye,Daddy!

To my dearest dad,

I know you are sad to leave here.
It is the same feeling for me.
My tears are rolling down my cheeks
when I realise that you won't come to Kampar anymore
to fetch me home.
I try to convince myself that
I should adapt to it since I was young.
I know this is not what you really want.
However,I still can't accept it as a truth or even a habit.
I still remember that I blame you for working abroad
and leave us here.
Dad,I never meant to hurt you.
Sorry about that.

I hate people say that children who are brought up
by their grandparents are not good.
Don't worry,Dad!I won't become like what they said.
All these stupid commends
will force me to do better in order
to prove them that they are wrong.

I promise that I will try my best to adapt to
life in UTAR and Kampar
although I dislike to stay here.
It may be boring and hard to be here but not totally bitter.
I will work hard to go ahead to fulfill my dream.
I promise that I will take good care of all of them.
I will also try my best to learn driving.

Dad,I know it may be hard when you are not around
but I will try my best for everything in life.
Goodbye,daddy!
We will always miss you...

UTAR Kampar Life

It is extremely boring to stay and study here.
Everyday,I spend my time to surf the internet.
Nobody talks to me.
Sometimes,I don't ever meet my housemates
in the house.
Those friends whom I know,study different courses
or different streams.
I don't have friends to study the same group.
I try my best to meet some new friends in UTAR
but in vain.
Do they think I am too cool?
Yup.I am a bit cool but totally shy.
I need some time to be familiar
with the university and to be "hot".

It's so tired to cycle to the university.
It's too far from the Danish House.
Sometimes,I try to find a few reasons
to convince myself to take a bus.
If I am rich,I will definitely take a bus everyday.
(In case,I won't study in UTAR but to study abroad.)
Almost every night,I go outside with my friends for dinner.
The food is really expensive
but there are still many people who are willing to pay.
Everyone is lazy to cook.

I would say the lecturers and tutors here are okk.
Some can't speak fluently in English.
My sociology lecturer has a special voice.
When she talks,it sounds like a doll.
Do you guys know what I mean?
By the way,my Basic English lecturer can
speak like a native speaker.
I still can't speak fluently in English.
When can I be proficient in English like him?
I dread in phonetics.
Before that,I thought I am good in English and it would
be interesitng to study Basic English but it's totally a slip-up.
Most of the lecturers are not professional in teaching.
I am bored to study in UTAR.
Sometimes,I wonder whether I had made a right choice
to study in English Language.
When I saw my sis's blog,I realised that I had forgotten
both our dream.
I should study in Science or Bussiness
in order to fulfill that dream
but it needs RM200 for course transfer
and it doesn't guarantee that I manage to do so.
Regret!!!
Perhaps I can become a Vogue magazine editor
if I continue to study in English Language.
This's the only way that I can persuade myself.

When can I get the cheque from KYY Scholarship?
The others had got theirs.Those Malay officers are really lousy.
I have rejected the UTAR Scholarship
in order to own this scholarship.
I am worried that I will miss both.
My papa can afford to pay the fee
but it is unfair if we pay ourselves.
Am I going to pay the amount like
those who fail in SPM ?
What's the purpose to study hard and score full As?
What's use I study here?
If I can't get the KYY Scholarship,
then UTAR should give me its own scholarship.
At least it's fair if it does that way.
If I can't get both,I will pay myself for foundation
and continue my degree in UCSI.
It will be a good reason for me to transfer to other colleges.

I really hope everything is easy to handle.

I promise I will fly

This song "Fly" is sung by Super Junior-KRY.
I wish you guys will love it.
Its lyrics is so nice that I think
it will bring hope and cheer to many of us.

I finally decide to study the Foundation in Arts in UTAR Kampar Campus.
Perhaps it may not be a wise decision in many people's opinion.
I'm afraid that I have made a stupid decision.
Someone said I should study science subjects in Form 6
but I am only interested in Chemistry and I don't
think I can work systematically in a science lab.
Someone said I should study Bussiness or Marketing
and work in private sector.
Someone said I should become a school teacher.
Someone said I should not go to UTAR.
So confusing...

Is there any U-turn for me?
Never mind.
If UTAR is really bad in teaching and facilities,
I still can study English Language or
Mass Communication in UCSI
after completing my foundation in UTAR.
I must be homesick if I am so far away from home.
I still can visit my family members if I study in UTAR.
It is an opportunity for me
to learn independence and make new friends.
It can lead me to adapt to new environment
if I have to leave my hometown for my job.
Perhaps I should persuade myself that it is
not too bad to study there.
It is time for me to fly.

Actually,I want to become a fashion journalist.
Shheehh...Don't tell anyone.
It's my secret.
If I really can't make my dream comes true,
I can become a magazine editor or
a tuition teacher.
Do you think it is a good idea?
I hope I will have the courage to
pursue my dream.

It was so shocking that I found
out my former tuition teacher's younger son
was attacked by a terminal blood cancer last week.
I wish he can get well soon.Fighting~
Life is so barbarous and it will
end up easily without leaving any spots.
Nobody knows his own lifespan.
I don't care when I will die as
life is not measured by the number of breath.
I will care what I have not done during my lifetime.
Am I regretful if I haven't fulfill my dream before my death?
Is there anything that I want to tell to my lovely
family members and friends before my death?

I promise I will work hard to pursue my dream before my death.
I promise I will fly to Maldives,Copenhagen and Santorini oneday.
I promise I will FLY higher and HIGHER althought it is not easy...